When You Feel Stuck: Stop Explaining Yourself To People Who Don’t Get It
Clarity comes when you start trusting your pause.
You ever notice how people lose patience the moment you pause?
You could’ve been showing up all year.
Doing the work.
Doing it well.
But the second you slow down, people start asking:
“So what’s next?”
“Are you still doing that thing?”
And suddenly, you start doubting yourself.
You start thinking...maybe I’m falling behind.
Maybe I’ve lost my edge.
Maybe my pause means I’ve lost my purpose.
But let me tell you something: society doesn’t know what to do with people who are in between.
They love the rise.
They love the results.
But they don’t know what to do with the rebuilding.
The real problem
We’ve been trained to keep performing.
To keep proving.
To keep showing that we’re moving forward, even when we’re not.
We’ve learned to smile through confusion.
To post through burnout.
To act like we’ve got it all figured out.
But clarity isn’t something you chase.
It’s something that finds you when your mind gets quiet enough to hear it.
So when you’re in a season where things feel unclear, uncertain, or just messy...that’s not failure.
That’s the real work.
The unknown
I once heard Dr. Joe Dispenza, a neuroscientist and researcher who studies how the mind shapes reality, say,
“The unknown is the only place where change can happen.”
That hit me.
Because that in-between space, where you don’t have the answers yet...
that’s the space most people run from.
They fill it with noise, with comparison, with a fake type of confidence.
But the ones who learn to stay there,
those are the ones who end up creating something powerful.
The mindset shift
So instead of asking,
“What’s wrong with me?”
Ask,
“What’s trying to emerge from me?”
That’s how you move from fear to awareness.
From self-judgment to curiosity.
From pressure to peace.
When you stop performing for others and start listening to yourself, your energy changes.
And when your energy changes, your direction becomes clear, not forced, but natural.
How to handle the stuck seasons
Let me share what actually helps:
Be still on purpose.
Don’t fill your stillness with distractions. Sit in it. Let your intuition talk.Separate your worth from your productivity.
You’re not valuable because you’re achieving. You’re valuable because you exist (HELLOOO).Catch your mental loops.
The moment you hear “you’re falling behind,” stop.
That’s an old story.
Thank it, release it, and choose a new one.Visualize daily.
Picture where you’re going, not what’s missing. Feel that future now.Let people wonder.
You don’t owe anyone an explanation for your silence, your pivot, or your pause. I always tell them: ‘‘I believe in God’s timing.’’ And keep it moving.
The truth
I’m tired of seeing women: powerful, smart, creative women, shrink when they don’t have it all figured out.
But let me tell you;
You’re allowed to pause.
You’re allowed to not know.
You’re allowed to disappear for a while and come back when you’ve realigned.
Just don’t give up on yourself in the process.
So take your time.
Breathe.
Trust your pause.
And when you come back, show’em.
Sincerely,
Joyce
“You may not control all the events that happen to you, but you can decide not to be reduced by them.” — Maya Angelou


Completely agree with all of this People think that just because someone isn't going like the Energizer bunny, that means work isn't getting done. But like you said, they don't understand how God's working through us behind the scenes. It's not our job to help them understand. People will think what they want and we can't stop them. Gotta keep it moving and trust that God will see us through the seasons we're in. We have to be patient and wait on Him always.
Thanks for this reminder Joy and hope all is well on your end.
I read this at the perfect time! I’ve been through the pause, reflection, confusion and I can say, they were all necessary to get here.
Explaining oneself while taking time can be so draining. I’ve learnt to stop that too.
Every word here hits deep, I feel they’re meant for me. Thank you for this🫶🏼